Day 15: We're all upto mischief

Me: Hi
A: Halla

Me and 3ziz were walking alone, then followed us Taiba Sara and two of 3ziz's friends..

I kept looking down, I didn't give him any eye contact what so ever.

A: 6al3eeni..

I smiled. Yet I was still looking downwards

A: Modhi, 6al3eeni.

I looked at him. I knew I was blushing I can feel it, My cheeks were so warm.
I smiled again..

Wisalna to the soccer pitch, the gate was locked.

3ziz's friend: Magfoul, shlon bindish?
3ziz: nishga7?
Sara: Im wearing a skirt..
Taiba: La it's gona be hard..
3ziz: 3ayal shinsawe?
Me: Fee bux greeb hnee taboon enrou7?
Sara: Bess Modh don't you think it's gona be too public? Y3ny I mean what if someone we know saw us?
3ziz: Eee laa laa too risky

*Taiba's phone rings*

It's her mom.

We were all looking at Taiba, patiently waiting with no interuptions at all. No one spoke till she closed the phone.

Me: Shgalat?
Taiba: La 3ade don't worry bess si2lat 3ani.
Me: Ok look it's 9:30 already sar mitakher el wakt, I think we should get going.
3ziz: Eee walla, 9ij maswaina shey bess this was fun. Seeing you Modhi was more than enough.

Spotted Taiba and Sara looked at each other smilling.

3ziz's other friend didn't say a word until now..
" Lazem en3eedha..."

3ziz: Ashoufick stanast..

"Eee walla stanast"

3ziz: Modhi excuse me

He looked at Taiba..

3ziz: 6aiba this is Meshari. Mshari, 6aiba:D..

Meshari: Adre..

3ziz: El walad mo3jab feech, Egouli 7ilwa. 9arla sa3a he's pinging me egouli do a move..

Meshari: YAL GWA-.....

Taiba smiled.

Taiba: You're not bad yourself Meshari..

Day 14: The reunion

I was shell shocked with emotions, it was very hard to explain.

I quickly called 3ziz, while I was on my way to the exit with the girls

*ring*

Me: Hey, wain bitrou7 after this?

3ziz was with Wahab when I called him.

A: La7tha digeega Modhi...

He said my name, while he was with Wahab. Did Wahab hear 3ziz? What is Wahab thinking right now? Does he even remember me?
Ahh, constant thought were killing me.

3ziz salam 3ala wahab then rad 3lai. I tried my best to ignore Wahab and to not look him in the eye. Shame was over coming me when was supposed to be the opposite.

A: Hala Modhi
Me: Wait bitrou7?
A: Madre walla khal namshe together?
Me: Eee yalla, I'll ask Sara wain binrou7 then agoulick on bbm!
A: Yalla ok.

I hung up.

Me: Sara wain binrou7?
Sara: Kaifkum, bess lazem enrid gabil 10. 3ziz ou rb3a biyoon?
Me: Eee

I bbmed 3ziz
Me: Bin7ous, tyoon?
A: yalla ok, nil7agkoum

We all looked so happy, each and everyone of us had a smile brighter than sunshine...

Kina ga3deen nitmasha walla enshouf a soccer pitch

Taiba: Taboon enrou7?

Me: EEE!!

Sara: Akhaf we get caught!

Taiba: Chub, it's gona be fun!

Sara: Fine, the guys are coming?

Me: Agulohum?

Taiba: Kaifkum taboon?

Sara: Don't you think it's wrong?

Taiba: Waaih Sara you're so annoying, yalla Modh tell them eyoon

I called 3ziz giltla eyee ma3ana.

Sifa6na ou then nizalna, 3ziz was on his way to me.. YAY 7AGE!  Im actually going to talk to him in real life, face to face!

Day 13: Overdosed on drama

I quickly looked down. The last thing I needed right know is 3ziz finding out about Wahab.

Sara could tell whenever I'm upset, she kept on asking me shfeech ou agoulaha mafeeni shey

Me: Agoulich mnu hne?
Sara: Mnu?
Me: 3ziz..
Sara: 7ILFAAAAY!!! WAINA?
Me: Shh y7mara ynsimi3!
Sara: Waina?
Me: Look waray on the right side, labis a letterman jacket! Blue one..
Sara: EE SHIFTAAA!!

Taiba knew how he looked like, she knew he was here but she just didn't say a word.

I turned around looked at 3ziz, found him looking at me! Our eyes met again.

I checked bbm.

3ziz: Sorry tana7t..
Me: 3ade, laish am I that ugly?
3ziz: Modhi you're beautiful, I just couldn't help myself. You're perfect.

I read, I didn't answer! I turned around to look at him..

I smiled, shafne he smiled back.

While smiling and almost blushing, shift wahab ib biyath 3yoni. I knew he was looking. I felt it, I felt like I was struck by a bolt of lightning. I felt stoned I couldn't move a muscle! I haven't seen him in 3 years and now I find him here? This was definitely not the right time! My mood automatically switched from madly inlove to drastically upset. It was as if wahab could set my heart on fire!

A: Shfeech?
Me: Walla shey..
A: Shklich mitthayga
Me: La walla shey
A: Ok bagoulich shey..
Me: Goul
A: Modhi A7ibich
A: You dont have to say anything.


My heart skipped a beat. It felt so right in so many ways! Words could'nt explain how I felt. It was just what I needed to hear to calm me down. It's funny how one word can give me this many butterflies.

45mins later...

*bbm convo*

A: Yalla e7na bnamshe mita btamshoun?
Me: Soon.
A: La leave al7een a7san wayed shabab 9ar.
Me: 3ade..
A: La mu 3ade a'3ar leave..
Me: Enshalla

He stood up byi6la3...


*Phone rings*

It's 3ziz!

Me: Aloo hey
A: Yalla abeech ti6li3een jidami
Me: Enzain yalla ka 6al3een, Rou7 we'll follow
A: Yalla ok na6rich bara

He hung up.

I stood up, picked up my clutch, then looked back at 3ziz.


Wigaf esalim 3ala a bunch of guys, I looked closely walla
3ziz was talking to Wahab.

Day 12: Caught up in surprise

A: Modhi I like you
Me: I like you too
A: No, I really really like you...
Me: Hmmm?
A: I know we just met bess kill ma akalmich arta7
Me: Madre shgoulick 3ziz

I knew exactly what to say, I didn't have the guts to say it. I knew exactly how I felt about him. Love, pure love.

A: You don't have to say anything, wain bitrou7een elyom?
Me: 360 you?
A: Shalaih
Me: Have fun, Im gona nap 3ashan awal magoum I shower ou arou7.
A: Thanks, Sa3a cham bitrou7een?
Me: 7:30
A: Ti9bi7een 3ala 5air
Me: Winta min ahla!

The day went great, exactly how it was planned!

Days passed. Me and 3ziz have been talking everyday of the week. It still feels like the day I met him. Talking to him made my heart gush blood more than it ever did!

Bit by bit our relationship's getting stronger and denser. Was it just me? It's gona eventualy kill me if I didn't do anything about it. He's the one that can make my day the best and the worst! I have completely lost my common sense and logic! It's what he does not only controls my mood but me. Now I realize it's not a crush anymore, no crush hurts this much! I'm going crazy, I love him. I love 3ziz.

Today's Thursday, Sara promised me and 6aib ena bit6ali3na ib sayaratha!
Im omw home, exausted from school.

Aziz: How was school?
Me: Great! Yours?
Aziz: Good, I was thinking of you 6ool el wakt..
Me: Why thank you Abdulaziz

Once again i didnt want to make it awkawrd.

Aziz: Np;* Plans elyom?
Me: MY BFF BIT6ALI3NE IB SAYARATHA!
Aziz: 3endaha license?
Me: Yea, she turned 18 last week!
Aziz: Wain bitrou7oun? Ymkin I stalk you..
Me: Nestle! COME!
Aziz: Yalla foga what time are you going?
Me: 7:30ish!

It was 5:30 I was getting ready to go out, Sara's picking me at 6 we're then picking Taiba ou bin7ous shway then binrou7 Nestle.

7:30 mithel magilt 7ag 3ziz wislna Nestle, awal ma wislt i was bbming 3ziz looked up walla Wahab ib wayhe.

Our eyes met, Me and wahabs. Then I saw 3ziz, it's like we formed a triangle. They were both looking at me...    

Day 11: Sara's day

Me: Laish balla?
T: YOU FORGOT HER BIRHTDAY!!
Me: Elyom 15th?
T: EE YA7MARAA!!!
Me: Fxck!

I bought her a present, I just forgot to wish her a happy birthday!
I ran to find her, couldn't find her anywhere!

*Ring*

I ignored the bell and kept on looking for sara!
10mins later I went to class!

Teacher: Where have you been Modhi?
Me: What sir?
Teacher: Just sit down for gods sake..

I walked in and found Sara!

Me: Sarona ya 7ilwaaaa!! I was looking for you
S: Chub latkalmeeni
Me: Afaa? I ran out of breath running and looking for you ib kill el madrisa!

Sara looked at me smiled then looked away. Sara Matsheel shey ib kha6irha, Bsir3a elkil ygdar eratheha!

Me: Shlon my birthday girl?
S: You still didnt say it...
Me: HAPPY BIRTHDAAAAY!!!!

Teacher: Modhi you come in late and you disrespect me?
Me: Sorry sir, it's Sara's birthday! I love her shsawe?

Everyone laughs, including Sara!

When it was lunch time, I was walking with Sara to the cafateria..

Me: When are you getting your license?
S: Bacher!
Me: I CANT WAIT! Can we go out?
S: Matwa8a3 baba byirtha
Me: 3ade 7inay btw I have loads to tell you.
S: After school..

Me, Taiba, Rawna8, Sara, Nora and a few other girls are going to 360 today! We planned her birthday. We booked the vip room in b+f!

On my way home I checked bbm..
3ziz bbmed me!

A: Hey you!
Ok look I dont know how this happened but I have to tell you something
Me: Hey, goul you're scaring me..

My phone rang, it was Sara!

S: Goulay..
Me: Bacher! It's your birthday today, it has to be all about you!
S: Waaaaay Modhi yalla tell me
Me: Mabe! Bacher...
S: Fine yalla bye..

She hung up. 


Im falling for him hard, I know I am. Reading his name gave me butterflies! 


Me: 3ziz goul, shfeeck?
A: Madre shlon agoulich..
Me: Just tell me..

Day 10: Another perfect day until...

*phone convo* 

A: Salam 3laikum
Me: haha, 3laikum elsalam
A: Shlonech?
Me: Machina we've been talking for 4 hours now.. I'm good you?
A: Adre haha! Zain dam eni g3ed akalmich.

My day was perfect. We both said we'd talk for a few minutes then sleep. Ended up not sleeping at all.

A few hours later...

Me: Ola it's 5:30 Already!
Him: Adre, it's like I'm addicted to you... How did this happen?

I was speechless. I didn't know what or how it was happening.

A: I met you less than 24 hours ago and now I'm so attached.
Me: It's called magic.

I didn't want to make it awkward.

A: La walla 9ij Modhi. I don't usually let anyone in, not this quick at least.

The feeling of fear and ecstasy simultaneously throbbed throughout every pore of my body. It was all too good to be true. I had to cut if off to realize that this is all true, and also to stop myself from falling so hard in a short period of time.

I quickly changed the subject

Me: Madre shgoulick 3ziz, anyways 3aziz its 6:15 already I really have to shower and get gone mama al7en would probably etdish 3alay to check on me...

A: lazm tro7en ya3ni?

Me: I guess...

A: Lazem lazem...?

Me: Eee, sorry

A: Enzain promise me something?

Me: Shnu?

A: Just say I promise.
Me: Tell me shnu awal?
A: JUST SAY IT!
Me: I promise..
A: Ena we'd talk on the phone tonight..
Me: Bess..

Makhalani akamil kilmity...

A: You promised!
Me: Fine!

I closed the phone, showered, got dressed then went to school.

I was so tired and sleepy. Omw to school I was thinking to my self, Y3ny awal shey I was crazy about him. I stalked him everyday, morning and night and now this? Egouli im addicted to you? This was too much to take in for a day, yet it was extraordinarily perfect.

Awal ma wi9alt school Taiba ran up to me.

Taiba: UMBAII!! SARA'S SO PISSED AT YOU!!    

Day 9: Surprise?

Ouuff it was just a broadcast! I thought to myself y3ny how stupid can I be to think that he'll add me... min wain eyeeb my pin balla?  

Bacher Thursday ou killish mali khilg anam, it was 8pm. Me and 3ziz's conversation went to an end when I told him I'll accept him if he added me. I had nothing to do gilt i'll watch a movie.

I kept checking my phone, I got loads of bbms but didn't bother checking them because they're probably broadcasts. I was checking my phone for any Dms. Nothing.

An hour through the movie I go a dm! FINALLY, he talked to me again.

" I thought you said will accept me? "

SHIT! I quickly went to bbm and found a request! How stupid of I not to have checked bbm.

I accepted him.

A: Hey
Me: Shlon?
A: Shlon shnu?
Me: Shlon you found my pin?
A: Skills.
Me: Im serious!
A: im serious too!
Me: 3aziiiiiiizzz!!!
A: 3yona
Me: Walla shey!

It's like he knows how to reply to everything! I stopped watching the movie, I closed my laptop, and layed on my bed talking to 3ziz. I bbmed him till it was 2 am.

Me: 7ail ta3abt, banam al7een tabe shey?
Him: Ou et5leeni all alone?
Me: La2 6ab3an enta bitnam too!
Him: Magdar anam.
Me: Laish balla?
Him: Ma7ib anam while wanting something.
Me: What do you want?
Him: Abe asma3 9outich gabil la anam, mara7 arta7 ela lama asma3a.

I was typing, telling him that it was too early for this...

Him: Latrideen Modhi
Him: 3ashany?

I deleted what I had written, I knew saying yes was wrong yet I didn't want to make him upset. My heart was telling me to say yes, my brain wasn't. I've always been so stubborn. This time I told my self i'd stop being like this.

I gave him my number.

Me: But this has to be quick! We both have to sleep...
A: Inshalla!

My phone was ringing, as well as my heart! I waited for it to ring twice then picked it.

Day 8: Who could it be?

3ziz dmed me! SHLON?

Words can't explain how I felt! i was disorianted and confused but I was excited and happy at the same time.

I called Taiba straight away!
Me: Come on 6aibbb, Comme onnnnnn!!!
Mom: Shfeech Modhawi?
Me: La walla shey mama, a7ibich

I ran to my room, slammed the door then called Taiba again

Taiba: Shfeeeeeccch? 7annnaaannnaaa!
Me: 6AAAIBB HE DMED MEEE!!!
Taiba: Wanasa! shgalich?
Me: Shnu wanasaa you took my phone didnt you?
Taiba: I had to lu I didn't chan you never followed him... enzain shgalich?
Me: "hey" Wait why arent you excited? Im dying!
Taiba: Lana I knew this was coming ya 7ilwa, enzain say hey back
Me: La 7ilfay? Yallla shh bye.

I closed the phone, went on twitter and replied to him with a "Hey"
Seconds later rad 3lai
"Shlonech?"
"7imdilla good, you?" I replied

I wasn't only good! I was nervous, I was stressed and I was happy. The happiest anyone can ever get.

I called Taiba to tell her!

Taiba: Shsar?
Me: He asked me if this guy eseerle, I said no to him.
Taiba: Eee obviously galich chthy, bikalmich mayadre shlon!
Me: Wait wait, he dmed me
Taiba: Shgal?
Me: OMG OMG OMGGG!!!!!
Taiba: SHSAAAR??!?!?!
Me: He told me im pretty
Taiba: Gouleela thank you!!
Me: Adre giltla
Taiba: Inzain sim3ay baroo7 atsaba7 when im back adig 3laich if I had time!

She hung up.

Me and 3aziz talked for 2 hours dm, none stop!
After that he asked for my pin, giltla no.. its too early b3dain we talked walla agoula try to find my pin.. If you find i'll accept you!

30mins later i check my phone, I have a bbm..

Day 7: Satisfaction only leads to despair

3ZIZ, 3ziz followed me!!!


But how? He doesn't know I exist, thoughts creped up on me, big and small! How did this happen? Am I dreaming? I was going crazy, I freaked out! I didn't know what to do! 


Me: 6AAAIIBAAAAA!! WALLA EL3ATHEEM I HATE YOU, NO NO I LOVE YOU!! Shswaitay? How? When!


Am I over reacting or what? I started asking my self questions, my heart started beating so fast!!


Taiba: Balla t7il6um! Aren't you happy?
Me: OFCOURSE I AM BUT TELL ME! HOW?


I quickly answered her with my voice raised.


*Bell rings*


Me: 7ywana madre shimsawya, my heart's skipping a beat! Afterschool bitgoulenle kill shey fahmaa? Yalla bye!!
Taiba: Bidal ma you thank me etgouleeni 7ywana? Masssshi modhio mashi
Me: THANK YOUUUUUU!! 


I hugged her as tight as I can and I ran to class.


Last lesson took ages, I was waiting for the day to end! I just want to go home, I just want to check my twitter! Maybe he talked to me, or maybe he didn't.. I didn't want to get disappointed but i couldn't help it. I was too excited, and too hyper!
I couldn't concentrate for the entire day. It was like my neurons only activated at the thought of 3ziz.


*Ring*
"FINALLLLY" I shouted as loud as I can
I can see Taiba smiling from a far! I ran to her, as fast as I could.


Me: 6aib, yalla tell me! Yalla yalla yallaaa....
Taiba: Entay malich shighel, stop asking me shlon! Am I a genius or what?
Me: I have to go my mama called, walla bitgoulenli b3dain mali shighel!
Taiba: Eseer khair 7bebti 


I rushed to the car to check my phone again and to follow him back on twitter. 


I unlocked my phone and found a dm... It's definitely not 3ziz I'm not following him... who could it be?

Day 6: In high spirit

It's Saturday today. I had loads of studying to do.


I started my day with checking his ask.fm, as I've been doing for the past 3 months. I had lunch early today so that I can start studying. 


I studied for about 45mins, with constant thought about 3aziz. It was getting over the top. It made me so distracted from my studies, and my life. 


.... An hour later, I gave up! After 3 attempts of studying, I just cant! I decided to call Taiba.


Me: Aloo, hey
Taiba: Shtabeen..?
Me: Olla elnafsiya shfeech?
Taiba: walla shey sarle 3 hours im studying, dirastay ?
Me: I'm trying, Magdar! 6aiba bagoulich shey..
Taiba: Goulay, Shfeech latkhar3eeni?
Me: La dont worry, bess mu giltlich 3an 3ziz?
Taiba: Eeee? Shfee.. Shimsawya? Shsawa?
Me: Walla shey, walla! Bess I cant stop thinking about him 6aiba! I admit I do have a crush on him! 


I felt like crying, I finally let it out and I loosened up! It's starting to hurt and im getting too emotional. I never felt like this before at least I never thought I would. A guy i've never talked to makes me feel this way, and it just makes me wonder about what would happen if we talked.


Taiba: Adre, 7sait! Kamlay...
Me: Ok this might sound crazy, but I check his ask.fm everyday! I've been doing it for the past 3 months now.
Taiba: MODHI MU MINSIJICH!!! Bathbi7ich ana bathbi7ich!! THREE months? 
Me: Ee...
Taiba: Ou maswaitay shey bess stalked???
Me: Eee, anyways I really needed to get this out of my head, jad! Now that I told you a7is I can think less about him and more about School. Baroo7 adris tabeen shey?
Taiba: La salamtich, bess mara elyaya bitgouleeni killshey whether you like it or not FAHMA?
Me: Fahma, I love you!


I quickly hung up and started studying! After I was done with math I went to bed.


In the morning i went to school! Had the exam, 7imdilla it went good.


At lunch I was with Taiba, she was smiling the whole time! I was getting suspicious so I talked to her..


Me: 6aib bala laf ou dawaran 5iray, shimsawya?
Taiba: Haha, Check your followers!


My heart skipped a beat. The first thing I thought of was him, 3aziz. I opened twitter, went on my followers, and I couldn't believe it..

Day5: The BBQ

Today is Friday. Me, Taiba and Sara already made plans. Gilna ensawe Bbq, we needed this time to have a little break from our worries. So benrou7 Sultan centre nishtiri aghrath then stay at my place, perfect!


We ate burgers and had smores later on, so we were full. Kill wa7da khathatlaha a corner ou gi3dat etsawe her own thing.
Sara was bbming, Taiba was eating and i was on my laptop.. 
 I was on his ask fm. Aziz's. Having the smallest telepathic connection with him was enough to make my day. I'm not happy but satisfied, a temporary feeling.


A few minutes later Sara and Taiba caught me. Great, thats just what i needed.


"Modhi spill.." Sara said
"Spill whaaattt??" i said while smiling
"Y3ny shyfa dihin ib rasna? We both know it's something more than you finding him hot" Taiba galat
"Waaay, chub bess im bored so ri7t 3ala his ask, shfeeha?" I lied.
"7yati sooner or later ba3arif, gouleeli al7een a7san min ma it gets stronger ou titwahigain" Sara said


She was right, it is getting bigger.. Me checking his ask fm is becoming a daily ritual. I thought i'd never like anyone after Wahab, but here i am liking Aziz more and more by the day.


 "Uff maku shey, its NOT a crush"  I said
"LIESSSSS!!!" Sara said
"La7tha wait wait who said anything about a crush? OOOHHHH fith7tay rou7iicccch" Taiba smirked

Shes right, It is a crush.

Day 4: Friend or foe?

Taiba told me that she heard stuff.  Apparently he was a so-called player and he talked to more than one girl at once. At least that’s what they say. I never prejudice people before getting to know them properly. Rumors spread everyday, all kinds and I wasn't going to fall for this one But somehow 7az ib 5a6ri hal shay, It hurt when it wasn't supposed to.

This week passed by so fast, it was like a blink of an eye.

Its Thursday today me and Sara Wanted to hang out, i suggested a few places but she preferred to stay home...  Then Sara invited Nora, i wasn't very happy with this but i had to act normal. We went to Sara's house. It was very awkward since Nora was around. I stayed there a few hours then went home.

Nora and I met when we were kids. In grade 9 we fought and stopped talking for 2 years. Until this day I haven't forgiven her for what she had done. 3ashan rfeejati asawe nafse ena nisait ou ena I forgot but I never did and I never will even though I tried. I don't trust anymore.

In Grade 9 I loved this boy, he was everything I can think of. I got bad grades in school because of him. I lied to my parents most of the time because of him. I lost a bunch of weight because of him. I even cried my self to sleep everyday because of him. Everything good and bad that happened to me that year was because of him, it was bitter sweet. It wasn't puppy love.

He was an asshole that had no feelings what so ever. He crushed my heart, totally! .. into tiny pieces and left me there, stranded in the darkest boulevard.

Me and Wahab met when I was in 8th grade. We talked and got so close for a year, then I told him I liked him. He asked me to be his girlfriend, I obviously said yes. Biggest mistake of my life yet I did it anyways because my stupid heart controlled every inch of me. I regret every second of thinking about him.

Nora and Wahab met each other and got close without me knowing, They used to Skype, talk on the phone without me knowing. He used to go out with her and she used to embarrass me by telling him all my secrets.

5 months of being with him, madly in love, then I find out about this? Nora and him are in  love, he's been cheating on me with my bestfriend.

How is that even possible? Shlon aku  nas chthy 3aysha bildina? SHLONN?? I never talk about what happened, my friends never knew what happened because they didn't know about Wahab in the first place, they never knew what he did to me because I was ashamed of admitting it. Kharaftlihum salfa why i was upset ou mishat, they went with it.

Took me 3years to forget.

Day 3: Bitter sweet feelings.

The guy that I saw at the ma3rath weeks ago! I couldn't believe my eyes. What a coincidence.

"Rawna8, mnu hatha ib your dp?" Giltllaha

"My cousin, i love him so much laish?" radat 3lai

"La walla shey, i was curious" 

I was shocked. I couldn't believe my eyes. It was too much to take in but like always I enclosed my feelings in a jar labelled "Agitation. Desire and despair"

Meanwhile I remembered the feeling I had when my eyes first saw him. At that time kint fathya so gilt let me do my research. Took me a few minutes to find him on twitter, Isma 3aziz! i read his bio then BINGO!  Refuge found on a link to his ask.fm.

Went on ask fm read some questions then I took a long nap. I needed the rest.

*annoying music*

Ouff! my alarm was a screeching bat to the ear. It is so annoying.. i woke up, went to school then I figured that it was only fair to mention some of this to Sara..

I told her that he's cute but no way anything will happen as he's Rawna8's cousin for god sake. I don't want to look like one of those girls who has friends for benefits, I'm not like that and I'm definitely not gonna risk my reputation and I neither want to lose her. More to mention, she'll clearly get the wrong impression about me.

Rawna8 walked in while me and sara were discussing the situation and my issues.  Sara and I looked at each other and stayed quiet, then Taiba came along.

Me and Taiba met a long time ago but just now recently we got close... I trust her so much. She's the kind of person that's there when you need them and is always a big help. She has her own ways of being unique and is beautiful outside and inside.

In lunch i mentioned Aziz to Taiba... Told her nothing happened, but I spilled the beans.

I mentioned Aziz to Taiba And Sara but i didn't tell them about the feeling i got the first time I saw him, I've never felt that way before, and I bet that I'll never feel that way towards anyone not just because I can't but also because it hurts so much. I never want to feel this helpless and stupid again.

After I finished telling Taiba everything and I emptied the little jar inside of me… she told me she had bad news...

Day 2: Aggravation in disguise.

I ignored what I had felt as I do always, and had my normal life for the rest of the week. Little did I know that things were gonna slip out of my hands.

I was always known as the girl that guys couldn't talk to rudely, the girl that was quiet yet knew everything. I keep everything to myself, a very conservative person you'd say. I've been broken once, it made me weak and careless after it.

     People tried telling me that I was pretty, but me being the stubborn little girl I always was, I kept telling myself that I was average, nothing significant. I lacked a women's favourite accessory, confidence. I always over think. I always try to be careful even though I know nothing can break my heart as it's already broken and is unfixable.

     I'm a senior, This means this is my last year in school, i need to focus and be super careful of my actions. Sm3ity aham shey.

      Weeks passed and I still was very close to Rawna8. Me and Rawna8 Have been friends for so long. She's a great friend and unbelievably understanding. She's one of those friends that actually cares and doesn't take bullshit from others. She's one of the strongest women I know oo hatha a7san shay feeha.

"Modhi!" Rawna8 said

"Hey! shlonech?" I replied

"Good good, you?" She said

" Fine, 7imdilla" i said 

We talked for about an hour.. Rawna8 changed her dp, I opened it to see it clearly.. It was her with him.

Day 1: Struck out by Him.

It all started as a small crush! Just a feeling.  I thought that it wasn't going anywhere but now it's killing me! This is how it went...

        Kint ray7a elma3rath with my best friend Sara.

Sara and I met about 3yrs ago, not very long but it was enough time for me to depend on her and realize how much of a good friend she was. I wasn't gonna give her up for anything, she was the reason I smiled when I was down, she was one of the most happiest people I met. She reeks energy, she's so filled with life.  Now I trust her with everything and anything, you name it! Sara's tall, White hearted and most of all strong.

       Me and Sara went together and met our friends there. Everything was all normal, nothing new untill I saw him, It was like love at first sight.

 I couldn't stop thinking about him, few minutes later I thought to my self 

Waih shd3wa I'm over reacting, he wasn't that cute and love at first sight doesnt really exsist.

Denying the fact that i felt something. The whole time kint sara7ana, over thinking.

Sara: HAYYY!! MU'6III

Me: Na3am?

Sara: Shfeech sarlich sa3a sar7ana! Shit fakreen feee?

With a smirk on her face..

Me: La walla shey..

I clearly lied to my bestfriend...